My Valentine's Gift To My Husband

by Bonnie Kallenberg

My husband was out of town this week. Do you know what that means? It means I had an evening to myself in his closet…Yep, it was time to begin the long over-due closet clean out.

Men rarely purge their closets and hang onto everything just in case they need or want it sometime in the future. Many are big fans of T-shirts signifying some event they attended from sports to concerts, races and bars. They have company logo polo shirts. They think pants with pleats and cuffs will come back in style and they probably will but when they do, those they’ve saved won’t fit, I promise!

It was after a day at work but I was excited to start and went in with trash bags, donate to charity bags, and a basket for items that had promise for Finders Keepers Menswear. I began the process by going through all 4 bars looking for items that were:

1. Torn, stained, or ruined in some way. These all went in the trash.

2. Outdated or things I didn’t like on him. These went into donation bags.

3. Not his best style or fit: The better things went in the basket for assessment for the menswear store, the others went in the donate bags. Total Transparency: most of his went in donate bags and didn’t make the cut for our menswear store. A definite downside to above mentioned “men rarely purge their closets”.

4. Clothing that worked for him but needed to be laundered. Pulled off the hangers and dealt via laundry room or dry cleaners.

Then I gathered all the excess hangers to recycle, others to put in the laundry room.

Then I picked up all the bits of paper and receipts, odds and ends, trash, dry cleaning bags and sorted them into a box for him to go through and trashed the rest. Then I Swiffer dusted the floor.

Took the trash bags out to the trash can, put the donate bags in my car to deliver to charity, bagged the hangers to recycle and put in my car with the dry cleaning items and started laundry. Done, in 1.5 hours!

I did not donate his “I Love Bacon” T-shirt or his Atlanta Flames Jacket from the 70’s that is 3 sizes too small. I didn’t touch the sacred stuff, only the day to day. I didn’t get to drawers or folded clothing but that’s on my list for the next night he’s out of town!

My Valentine’s gift to him, a closet with room to spare! I wonder if he’ll notice?


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